Trouble has a way of finding David Mortimore Baxter.

“Gran’s always going on about how I don’t have any manners. But I reckon I do. Just to prove it, I’ve written this book. If you follow this guide to good manners, I reckon you could probably have dinner with the Queen or someone else really important, like Smashing Smorgan. Thank you for reading this blurb (see, good manners!).”