Following the phenomenal success of Grumpy Old Men, the quintessential grumpy old man, David Quantick, has taken a well-deserved holiday. But no matter where you go, there is always something to moan about.

You're stuck behind endless caravans on the M4, waiting for a non-existent filthy train, hanging around looking at crap luggage in an airport. Is it going to be worth the effort? Of course is b****y well isn't.

David Quantick here explores everything that makes the rest of the world different – and therefore worse – than Britain and lets us know exactly why it is safer to stay at home than to become grumpy old men on holiday. The indispensable guide to the grumpy old xenophobe in us all.